Backdrop My hair has always spoken on my behalf. Not just my hair; yours does it too. It communicates to the world about how you feel about the place you’re in at that moment. That up-do is telling me you’re having a fancy day. Your gnarly top-knot bun says you didn’t think we would run … Continue reading
Tag Archives: New York
The Oscars
I don’t usually watch the Oscars because we don’t have TV. I like to tell people that so it seems like I’m academic. Maybe you’ll picture me sitting next to a fireplace reading books and Economist articles, listening to TED talks and NPR radio. But, obviously. Obviously. I have Netflix, Hulu Plus, HBO GO, Amazon Prime, and iTunes. So, … Continue reading
WhoaMG! My Coworkers have Tinder
I’m single and I’m 30 – and I don’t want to be either. But what are ya gonna do? That’s not a rhetorical question. What Am I Going To Do? First, I’m going to lie about my age, then I’m going to do some online dating. Seemed like a rock solid plan, I thought. Well, … Continue reading
ALL / Fire Safety / Travel
Kale and the Amnesic Gold Fish
In Spring 2010, my travel buddy Erik and I were en route to Mount Rainier. We stayed overnight in Seattle with a friend on the way up to the mountains. We’d planned for regular houseguest kind of stuff – flowers, thank you notes, etc – but that only applies if your host doesn’t live in … Continue reading
You Keep the Label Maker
“I don’t know how to say this, but I think we need to break up?” I even used that up-talk that girls use when they can’t mold thoughts into declarative sentences. “I think you’re right,” he said back to my astonishment. Astonishment. Yea, he already knew. I mildly expected him to offer up reasons we … Continue reading
Zombie Nation
There are a few solid ways to rot your brian: Sipping the sizzup (thank you Lil’ Wayne), or Dropping a sheet of acid (thank you SLC Punk video!), and/or Getting preggers (thank you Michelle Duggar). I just found a new one, which is logging long flights in a short period of time. Some of us … Continue reading
Blastoff
I’m headed to my parents’ house right now to celebrate Christmas for 8 days straight. Like Scandinavian Hanukkah, but with more carols. In preparation for the trip, I ate all of this week’s left-overs cleaned out the fridge, laundered the linens for the house-sitters (albeit too early since I slept in a Snuggie last night), … Continue reading
Royal Flush
I am on a plane to San Francisco. Right now. When it was my turn at JFK airport security this morning, I handed the TSA agent my new horrible license (see picture) and a sheet of sudoku puzzles. I know, he was also confused. He looked at both sides of the paper, then asked, “Miss, … Continue reading
SANDY
It’s been five days since that mean lady came to town. This is what I’ve done. On Tuesday, I broke my work blackberry and then did nothing. Literally nothing. Except I raided a bodega #catfood. On Wednesday, I went to a black tie dinner at the Waldorf and then traded my soul to the devil … Continue reading
LumberJack
THE MEET I met LumberJack in my living room one June day in 2010. At the time, I was living with An Eccentric, so this was how I met most of my favorite new characters. You see, she collected friends like she collected suitors, and she went through suitors like tissue. This meant our apartment … Continue reading
