ALL / Travel

Zombie Nation

There are a few solid ways to rot your brian: Sipping the sizzup (thank you Lil’ Wayne), or Dropping a sheet of acid (thank you SLC Punk video!), and/or Getting preggers (thank you Michelle Duggar). I just found a new one, which is logging long flights in a short period of time. Some of us … Continue reading

ALL / Travel

Blastoff

I’m headed to my parents’ house right now to celebrate Christmas for 8 days straight. Like Scandinavian Hanukkah, but with more carols. In preparation for the trip, I ate all of this week’s left-overs cleaned out the fridge, laundered the linens for the house-sitters (albeit too early since I slept in a Snuggie last night), … Continue reading

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Caution: Teenagers

I babysat starting at the age of eight.  I babysat all the time – in elementary school, in middle school, in high school, in college.  And I was really bad at it. – To the parents I offered: cheap child care; my own ride home; a stream of good news about finishing homework, consuming vegetables, … Continue reading

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SANDY

It’s been five days since that mean lady came to town.  This is what I’ve done. On Tuesday, I broke my work blackberry and then did nothing.  Literally nothing.  Except I raided a bodega #catfood. On Wednesday, I went to a black tie dinner at the Waldorf and then traded my soul to the devil … Continue reading

ALL / Dating

LumberJack

THE MEET I met LumberJack in my living room one June day in 2010. At the time, I was living with An Eccentric, so this was how I met most of my favorite new characters. You see, she collected friends like she collected suitors, and she went through suitors like tissue. This meant our apartment … Continue reading